I'm feeling very scrooge-ish about the 4th of July holiday this year.
Not that I don't love my country, and not that I don't appreciate all the sacrifices made so that I could enjoy the freedoms I have, but I just don't want to do anything to celebrate.
Is it too much to ask to just stay home and sleep?
Not that I don't love seeing and spending time with my family or my husband's family.
I don't know. I think it's more that EVERYTHING is so much work and effort. Especially with my butt hurting the way it does. I never know when a particular movement is going to send me to my knees...
Plus, I'm an emotional wreck.
I cried at the chiropractor, on the phone with my sister, talking to the principal at my kids' school... right now...
The thing is, that I don't even know what is wrong! Is it just the toll of chronic pain? A result of the times we live in? Living with a slightly elevated stress level due to financial issues and starting a new business? Feeling like a big fat failure? Who knows.
Wow. Talk about "writing in the moment". Maybe I'll delete this post later, but I guess I'll just publish it for now. Because it's okay that I have a crappy day/moment - right?
It's just temporary. I will be totally fine. I AM totally fine. I guess I just needed to put it out there.
And I am actually smiling right this second while I listen to Sophie sing Taylor Swift "I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale..." and it's morphing into a made-up song about princesses and gardens...
Comments
And I so agree with you about EVERYTHING being so much work ~ just to have a little freakin' fun. Sheesh when did sleeping in and just hanging out at home on a holiday become not the thing to do... i wish...
I pray that dang (okay, i originally wrote damn but then changed it.. ooops!) nerve will un-nerve itself sometime soon!
love you lots and you always look great when I see you! we'll both hang in there! ;p